I Want To Invent Something Useless

This is what TV calls an “encore presentation”—as I wrote this blog originally
a year ago today. I did swap out a different video for your entertainment, however.

It was on this date in 1963 that the Hula Hoop was invented. I say “invented”, but really, how much thought went into a PLASTIC CIRCLE? The genius-if you can call it that—is in accurately forecasting that kids to adults would make fools of themselves by rotating their hips at a pace not designed by God in the HUMAN OWNERS MANUAL.

Big-time cashing in on this product was the result—and Mr. Hula Hoop laughed as he shook his hips all the way to the bank—probably somewhere in the Bahamas. Below is one of the original old TV commercials for the Hula Hoop-the NEW AND IMPROVED model with sand or beads or something inside that makes noise:






http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9U_nz1lgwvY

Of course, there are other useless inventions that have reaped their inventors rewards beyond reason or common sense. The Mood Ring and The Pet Rock come to mind. Useless? YES, yet extremely profitable for the guru responsible for bringing it to market.

I will be hard at work over the next several months trying to devise a cheap piece of crap that I can start a worldwide fad with. You will fall in love with my worthless piece of junk and you will buy it. If I am lucky, like the inventor of the Hula Hoop, you will not only APPEAR to be a fool by purchasing said crap in the first place, but also you will use it in front of OTHER people to:

a) convince them that my invention has enhanced your life and
b) CONFIRM that you are an imbecile by mere demonstration of my product (yet to be conceived, but certain to be embarrassing to all users)

If you have a good idea, we can work together! Want my daily blog in your inbox? (free-damn!) Let me know! Tim.moore@citcomm.com