Groundhog Day: Grown Men Rely On Rodent

I guess it’s official.

An early spring—predicted by Punxsutawney Phil---the well-fed groundhog who apparently did NOT see his shadow this morning.

That’s a relief—since a couple of feet of snow on the ground with another foot or so falling as I write—makes me think that this rodent is wrong.

Another possibility is that Phil took a groundhog correspondence course and is now a certified meteorologist---which would explain why his predictions will be incorrect. After all, weather forecasters comprise the only profession I know of where being consistently and dramatically off-base is no obstacle to employment or advancement.

It was on this date in 1887 that the first Ground hog Day was “celebrated”---and I think no other “if/then” scenario causes more confusion. If you, too, are a bit confused, it goes like this:

Groundhog sees shadow= 6 more weeks of Winter
Groundhog sees no shadow= Early Spring

Since groundhogs live about 6-8 years, there have been approximately 18 or so woodchucks to hold the coveted moniker “Punxsutawney Phil”. I’m not sure it’s a honor they actually strive to achieve.

Looking at it purely from the Groundhog’s point of view, it has to be a strange existence. Sure, life is easy. Unlimited food (whatever those things eat)-and pampering for an entire year culminates with a rather rude awakening every February 2nd. Yanked from a sound sleep, you are hauled out of your hole.

Greeting you are an assembly of fairly creepy old men, dressed in tuxedos with top hats. Thousands of spectators are also on hand—as are TV cameras from around the world. The glare of lights—all focused on your chubby little body as you are held high for all to see.

Now time for the main event. You are placed on a surface—and scrutiny over the shadow you cast-or lack thereof—is ascertained. Unaware of what a shadow even is---either rejoicing or expletives follow your appearance-----and then it’s back into your HOLE for another year.

Nice.

More inane than the adults that partake in this charade—is the news coverage it receives. The situation right now in Cairo is dire----but we must interrupt coverage in Egypt with this Breaking News Update:



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kMaMiO83rvI


Of course, for the people in Gobblers Knob in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania, the entire affair represents a goldmine. Not only is the attention of the nation fixated upon their little town (if only for an hour or so), but the economic boon is enough to…well…make grown men dress up in tuxedos and hoist a hairy rodent over the heads.

Their families must be proud.

The sale of groundhog keychains, T-shirts and hats must be worth sacrificing their dignity and self respect.

Today’s prediction was unusual, as Phil has NOT seen his shadow only 13% of the time.

According to the record books, that little critter has been correct only 39% of the time.

Yep, he must be a meteorologist.


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