As the days slip away and my Christmas gift list DOESN’T shrink, I take on a demeanor that maybe you’ve seen in the Mall before.
It’s the “Zombie Walk”—and you will most certainly witness it even if you don’t experience it yourself. The Zombie Walk usually afflicts men trying to buy something for the wives. The hallmarks include a shuffling of the feet as the eyes are almost completely glazed over. Victims are not only those personally afflicted, but also the sales clerks they come in contact with. These unfortunate souls are saddled with the weighty problem of making a sale to an idiot for someone who is even more unfortunate to have married said idiot.
The Zombie Walk is simply aimless shopping in a catatonic state. You don’t know what to purchase-and this haphazard wandering (sometimes followed by babbling in the corner of the store) manifests itself most acutely on Christmas Eve, when gift items that never would have passed muster a week prior-all of a sudden start to look appealing.
Imagine her delight when she unwraps the nosehair clipper!
See you in the doghouse! (here’s that link again)
http://bewareofthedoghouse.com/videoPage.aspx
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